6 totally accurate dating scenes from 'Master of None'
LatestI watch A LOT (close to 25) of television shows, and aside from Broad City, there aren’t many that accurately capture the essence of dating and living in a world where everything is at your fingertips. Netflix’s new comedy Master of None can now be added to the list, thanks to the spot-on dating scenarios. There are so many relatable moments that while watching the show I pondered whether Aziz Ansari had read one of my never-ending group chats; there’s the dichotomy of using the internet to find both the best tacos and answers to “could this get her pregnant?”
Here are the six best IRL dating moments from Master of None. I would warn you that there are spoilers ahead, but let’s be honest, you’re one episode away from finishing, right?
1. The awkward one night stand
In “Plan B,” Master of None tackles the worst thing that can happen while having sex with a stranger; the condom breaks. Dev (Aziz Ansari) and Rachel (Noël Wells) enlist Google to find out if “pre-cum” can impregnate and Uber to go to the drugstore to buy Plan B. It’s the subtle moments that make this episode hilariously awkward: Dev presenting the options of UberX and UberBlack to Rachel so that she won’t think he’s being cheap about Ubers. Dev asking Rachel if she wants to get some snacks along with the Plan B pill, and then offering to pay because it’s “his treat.” But my favorite moment? When Rachel struggled with closing the taxi door after they said their goodbyes and lied about planning to hang out again.
2. The agony of waiting for a text reply
In “Hot Ticket,” Master of None explores the pain of waiting on a potential date to reply to your text message and the fear of rejection, broken down by the number of hours until the actual date (in this case, a Father John Misty concert). Dev is all of us. He gets excited about every text message that comes to his phone—only to be let down, because they’re from his friend, and not the woman in question. His friends are no help; one buddy suggests he just send the girl a picture of a turtle, with the message “sorry wrong person.” Dev checks his ladyfriend’s social media accounts to see if she’s been active on Instagram while not responding to his text message. This episode also offers a pro-tip to avoid feeling the pains of rejection: Text three potential dates at the same time inviting them all out, and see who responds first, duh!
3. The best and worst date idea ever
Who goes on a vacation as their first date? But, then again, who wouldn’t go on a vacation as a first date? In “Nashville,” Master of None presents the perfect potentially horrid first date idea: A day trip to Nashville. There are only two outcomes to this type of date: You really enjoy being around each other and can take naps together or you actually hate each other and would rather watch paint dry than spend time together. Fortunately for Dev and Rachel, it’s the former—and the trip leads to them eventually being in a relationship. Should we try this for our next date?
4. The justification of ghosting
Ghosting has gotten a bad rep, but is the idea of ignoring someone you don’t really want to talk to really that terrible? It’s not. Sure, maybe it’s a little immature, but in “Hot Ticket,” Denise’s voicemails from Princess Love aka Lil Funyun prove that sometimes ghosting is the only way, especially when three “I’m busy’s’ doesn’t work. If you keep replying to people, they will keep texting you. Of course, Denise ends up going out with Princess Love aka Lil Funyun—because who takes their own good advice?
5. The ups and downs of moving in together
In “Mornings,” Master of None perfectly contrasts a couple dating and spending a lot of time together with a couple deciding to live together. In the beginning, Rachel is just spending a lot of time at Dev’s apartment and everything is perfect. But when Rachel moves into Dev’s apartment, they both realize that their idea of clean isn’t exactly the same. Dev is a neat freak, while Rachel doesn’t mind clothes on the floor. Once the two get more comfortable with each other, the door for being honest is wide open; proving the point that healthy couples definitely argue.
6. The truth about weddings
Weddings make you feel things, question every romantic relationship you’ve had in your life (including the current one) and consider whether being so decisive is even a good idea. Mostly the questions go: Am I going to be alone forever? Or is this it (with your significant other)? In the “Finale,” Dev and Rachel attend their first wedding together, which makes him freak out—and imagine the bleakest, most realistic wedding vows I’ve ever heard. The scene explores the side of weddings that’s not usually publicly acknowledged: Doubt. The vows were basically saying what everyone was thinking. They went a little something like this:
Dev: Rachel, I’m not 100% sure about this. Are you the one person I’m supposed to be with forever? I don’t fucking know. And what’s the other option? We break up? That seems shitty too. I love you, I do, I love you so much, but not as much as Larry loves Andrea, damn. Goddamn. I mean that exists? No doubts, no fears, nothing, come on. I don’t know, I guess getting married is just the safer bet at this point. [pause] Sorry, I was just thinking about all the paths my life could have taken.
Rachel: Dev, you’re a great guy, you really are. But, you’re right, are we supposed to be together forever? I don’t know. And it just sucks because it feel like everything is laid out now, there are no more surprises. We get married, have kids, get old and then we die. And I’ve basically invested two of my prime years with you so I should just go all in. That’s just math. So, let’s do this, quickly.
Wedding Officiant: Do you, Dev, take Rachel to be your partner in a possibly outdated institution in order to have a quote-unquote normal life? Are you ready to give up an idealistic search for a soulmate and try to make it work with Rachel so you can move forward with your life?
Dev: I do
Wedding Officiant: Do you, Rachel, promise to make a crazy eternal bond with this gentleman who you happen to be dating at this stage in your life when people normally get married?
Rachel: I do
Wedding Officiant: I know pronounce you two people who might realize they’ve made an unfortunate mistake in about three years.
Since Dev moves to Italy, and Rachel moves to Tokyo, we’re guessing that season two will bring Skype, GroupMe and long distance relationships into play?
Tahirah Hairston is a style writer from Detroit who likes Susan Miller, Rihanna’s friend’s Instagram accounts, ramen and ugly-but cute shoes.