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A new study has provided evidence that taking naps during the day after a lousy night’s sleep can help reduce stress levels. As someone who is a fan of sleep and hyperboles, I thought it would be nice to take moment and review the power of shuteye.

1. So I’m not saying getting a full night’s sleep will guarantee a perfect bill of health, but…

…getting a full night’s sleep is correlated with taking fewer sick days at work.

2. And I’m not saying sleep will catch you before you fall into the clutches of depression, but…

…sleeping six hours or less can increase the risk of developing major depression. But then again, so can sleeping too much, FYI.

3. I’m not saying a lack of sleep will make you trip out, and not in a good way, but…

…a lack of sleep can cause hallucinations and general disorientation.

4. I’m not saying that sleep abnormalities will turn your life into a mundane version of 'Memento' (or worse, '50 First Dates'), but…

…sleep helps us consolidate and strengthen memories.

5. I’m not saying an untreated sleep disorder might make your bones disintegrate into a fine dust, but…

…sleep apnea’s effect on sleep quality influences some cases of osteoporosis.

6. I’m not saying lack of sleep = explosive diarrhea, but…

…sleep deprivation can exacerbate symptoms of inflammatory bowel disease, irritable bowel syndrome, and astro-esophageal reflux, as well as other gastrointestinal disorders.

7. I’m not saying no sleep will turn you into a mutant, but…

…not getting enough sleep affects your genes, which affects your immunity and responses to stress.

8. I’m not saying a lack of sleep will make you a terrible human being who operates on the same moral spectrum as the Javier Bardem character in 'No Country for Old Men,' but…

…a lack of sleep can decrease moral awareness, affecting our ability to identify unethical behavior.

9. I’m not saying longterm sleep deprivation will kill you, but…

…wait. Yes I am.

No, that's not a dancing condom. It's the Grim Reaper.