Here’s what angry internet men think about TV shows for women

On Wednesday, FiveThirtyEight published a fascinating and depressing analysis of IMDb data. They found that male users, who account for a disproportionate 70 percent of the database’s TV series raters, utterly tank the ratings of shows aimed at women. For example, the overall rating for Sex and the City is 7.0 out of 10, but that breaks down to a 8.1 from women and a 5.8 from men.

Out of (morbid) curiosity, we sought out the reviews that accompanied one-star ratings given by men to five beloved lady-oriented television shows. What we found will totally surprise you—unless you’re expecting a giant garbage fire fueled by sexism and self-loathing, in which case you won’t be surprised at all.

Of course, it’s one thing to dislike a show because you simply dislike it—and there are plenty of women who couldn’t care less about Carrie Bradshaw—but what you’re about to read is something else entirely. Again, these are actual reviews, written by human people with brains and hearts and families who love them. [Reviews are printed sic, as originally posted on IMDb, although any added emphasis is ours. It’s worth noting that a few of these gentlemen may not speak English as a first language—we only intend to mock their gender bias, not their grammar.]

Sex and the City

blah i used to think Sarah Jessica parker was cute till this show

i dunno. maybe i’m biased since i was forced to watch this horrid show by an ex girlfriend, but before i ever watched it, i used to have a crush on Sarah Jessica parker. then after a few episodes where all she talked about was “mr. big” and slept around all over the place, bashed men, bashed women, did girl things with her girl pals and bashed men some more or figured out new ways to be whiny, i grew to hate her character, which in turn, made her less attractive to me. and basically made any girl who subscribed to this lame show less attractive to me. and then it did something else. it made me think that all girls really think like that. and that disturbed me even more. then i watched it one more time, and it was the same thing-men bashing-girly stuff-drinking-cruising guys-buying shoes-making NYC seem like some Manhattan yuppie factory-and basically just being whiny. i can’t stand this show. i recommend to any guy that is being forced to watch it by his gf to immediately stop watching or your whole perception of women will be changed. IT IS NOT SOME INNOCENT GIRL SHOW……it’s taken me years to finally let myself believe that all women don’t think like the shallow characters in this show. run away. run far away.

Everyone who took part in this show should be on trial !

The very thought of this show and the face of the main character makes me aggressive…

They used everything they could in this show to attract their innocent victims. The cast is upper class, strong and supposedly hot women, wearing literally the latest fashion designs and doing whatever high society does pretending to live a “good life”.

The girls in this show, who i forgot to mention are using only taxis and limos to move around, are the males in their relationships and act like they should be role models for the modern woman. If these girls where men they would all have erection problems.

The witch who has the main role writes a shitty column, for a magazine I guess, in the end of each episode (kinda like Doogie Howser episodes ended,but he didn’t the nerve to publish what he wrote) which is supposed to give her enough money to spend around like a maharajah and of course there is a super-hot-rich-successful-and-nice-at-the-same-time guy who fancies her.

Of course all the middle aged women who never leave the house and all the fashion victims in this world could not stop watching this crap.

This show embodies what people hate about America but they couldn’t exactly put their finger on it until now. This is what the world thinks the American people are…

This show should be illegal.

Gilmore Girls

For Guys?? Only if they prefer other guys

Note to all females: If your “Boyfriend” likes this show, RUN! I saw some reviews here that pretend to be from normal males who say they actually watch this tripe. I don’t think so.

I actually dated a girl who loved this show. Dated….as in past tense. She thought I would like to watch so I’d have some type of looky-see into the female essence. Instead, I realized what a vacant-headed dunderhead I was dating! She even started talking more than usual with every episode of this show. She thought these boring talkers were trendy. I didn’t. End of our episode.

If she’s still watching, I’m sure it’s on a Saturday Night, with other, equally-minded females.

Worst than that “Jesus Take the Wheel” song by Carrie Underwood!

O.k, I really didn’t wanna write a review of this until I saw a decent amount of episodes. I have seen 6 episodes all together, with bits and parts of about 20, and I just have to say, this is the worst show I’ve ever seen. I meen, is this show suppose to be funny? It is completely un-realistic. If I ever come across a town with people as boring as Rory, Lane, or heaven for-bid , Luke, I seriously will hang my-self. Let me point out some key points of this horrible show.

First off, the characters. Rory is this serious, un-realistic teenager, who is best friends with her mom. Her mom, Lorlie, or something, is single mom who had bad connections with her parents. She is also best friends with her daughter. This is where we get the title for the show, Gilmore Girls. Now, the 2 worst characters in the show are Luke, and Lane. Luke is this static character, who owns a diner or something, and he always wears his little blue hat backwards. He acts more like a woman than a man, but that probably has to do with the fact hes on a woman show. Lane is the little ugly Asian girl, with the ugly glasses, and strict mom. She is very annoying.

Besides the horrible, unrealistic characters, the thing that makes me pull my hair out and grit my teeth when I watch this show, is the dialogue. What in the world is the director thinking!? He puts the scenes together so its suppose to seem as if the characters in the show are really “quick-witted” and come up with things to say really fast. But it just sounds like the whole episode is this giant run-on sentence between the characters! Doesn’t anyone else notice this? I feel like i’m taking crazy pills! The acting is horrible. The actors aren1t feeling the parts they’re playing, they are just waiting for there Q to speak and then they say there sentences, so nothing flows. No-one in the town is good-looking, except Rory, and the story-line sucks. I wanna advise everyone to stay away from this show. There are better ones out there. Try One Tree Hill, The O.C. (personal favorite), or even 7th Heaven is better then this crap. I give it a 1 out of ten, and that one point goes to Rorys looks.

Scandal

Ridiculous Tripe

This is the worst piece of putrefied garbage I’ve ever seen.

My g/f asks me to sit and watch it with her…”Sure honey, love to join in with you.” Makes her happy, right? That lasted exactly one and a half episodes. An hour and a half of my life I’ll never get back.

The casting is way off, the acting is weak, Tony Goldwyn is completely unbelievable as POTUS! I’m sorry to see Josh Malina on this show, I thought he was good on The West Wing. BTW, if you like a decent political/White House drama, try the West Wing or House of Cards. This show is a bunch of salacious BS. Soap opera stupidity.

Never again my sweet. Call your girlfriends if you’re going to continue to watch this tripe!

Unless you like Danielle Steel novels, skip this stupid show.

This show seems like it was written by or written for delusional women who would otherwise be reading ridiculous romance novels. Nothing that happens in this show is based in reality and no one on the show is emotionally older than 15. Furthermore, none of the characters have a personality. It sounds like the same person wrote every ridiculous silly tantrum that the show tries to make into an impassioned speech … every 7 minutes or so.

Olivia Pope is the biggest hypocrite I can remember in recent television, and Kerry Washington does a poor job with the acting, consistently coming off as a emotionally juvenile twit. She only has three faces: Hurt, Shocked and about to cry. She also throws herself at multiple men on the show and cheats on the married man she is cheating with. The entire show is pretty rough. I would have had a lot more respect for all actors involved had I skipped this disaster.

I hope I never see Kerry Washington in film again. She has the all the charm and scope of a mildewed washcloth and leaves just as bad a taste in your mouth.

The Mindy Project

Mindy is the best! This show is laughed-so-hard-I-stopped-breathing funny…..(really?)

Dreadful. Dreadful. Dreadful.

The title of this review was taken from another review, one which I found difficult to believe. It reminded me of someone eating a Whopper and exclaiming it was quite possibly the most wonderful dish they’ve ever shoved into their pie-hole. Stopped-breathing funny, huh? Your lack of taste doesn’t make it a good show, any more than the Whopper is an exquisite delight for the palate.

Unfunny, tired, predictable, and aimed at a very large and enthusiastic demographic. Why it’s not a bigger hit is beyond me, it’s got everything the easily-entertained adore. And more! It’s also got Mindy, easily the second or third most annoying and disgusting individual working in the industry right now.

If you love this show, you might be from Alabama, or have tires on your home, find Larry the Cable Guy hilarious, shop at WalMart, and/or can’t wait for buffalo-wing night at the Frosty Squirrel…every other Tuesday.

Ugly Betty

A nightmare.

I was sitting at my dentist’s office waiting for my appointment. The dentist have difficulties and I had to wait a bit more, the TV was on, and then pops that horrid show.

I saw an entire episode: OMG Am I in hell? That show is a remake of a south American soap opera. Betty reminds me a nerd girl from school. That was weird. This show is a total dull. I ask my dentist’s clerk if I could chance the channel and she answers: “the TV control is missing.” Then I ask her her again: “manually?” She answers: the TV button’s not working.

My cell phone battery was off and I have no choice but see that crap. So I had a headache when the show is over. And believe me: no one was watching that.

After that horrible nightmare, I never visit that dentist ever.

Molly Fitzpatrick is senior editor of Fusion’s Pop & Culture section. Her interests include movies about movies, TV shows about TV shows, and movies about TV shows, but not so much TV shows about movies.