Just 30 women have held Cabinet positions in all of American history. Franklin Delano Roosevelt got things going in 1933, a mere 144 years after George Washington assembled the first Cabinet, with the appointment of Frances Perkins as secretary of labor.
More than 80 years later, President Obama has built a more diverse administration than any of his predecessors: Women have made up about 30% of Cabinet or Cabinet-level positions in each of his two terms.
Hillary Clinton wants to do better. “I am going to have a Cabinet that looks like America, and 50% of America is women,” Clinton said back in April.
But why stop at half? Thirty-four of the 44 administrations have had no beef with an all-male cabinet. If Clinton wanted an all-female Cabinet, she could have one.
A Cabinet full of women would begin to correct a historic wrong, set a new bar for future presidents, and make men feel uncomfortable and excluded, so we came up with a list of women who could fill the vice presidency and the top positions at each of the 15 executive departments.
Here's our misandrist political fever dream:
Vice President of the United States
What's the job: The vice president is basically the president's understudy. If the president dies, or becomes incapacitated to the point that they can no longer perform their duties, the vice president steps in. The position comes with a tie-breaking vote in the Senate and the opportunity to give near strangers weird back rubs.
Who could get it: Kamala Harris.
Getting to know her: Harris was elected attorney general of California in November 2010. Her tenure as the state's chief legal officer and, before that, San Francisco's district attorney has been defined by major cases supporting labor, homeowner, immigrant, and LGBTQ rights. She is one of two Democratic women running to fill Sen. Barbara Boxer's seat.
Alternates: Elizabeth Warren, Patty Murray.
Department of State
What's the job: The secretary of state is the president's chief adviser on foreign affairs, and acts as a lead negotiator and Olivia Pope-style fixer with foreign heads of state. It was Hillary Clinton's old job.
Who could get it: Wendy Sherman.
Getting to know her: Sherman worked as a negotiator under Secretary of State John Kerry, and was instrumental in the Iran nuclear deal. (One aide went so far as to call her “badass.”) Sherman left the State Department for Harvard University’s Kennedy School, where she is a senior fellow.
Department of the Treasury
What's the job: The secretary of the treasury makes policy recommendations on financial, economic, and tax issues domestically and globally. She could, hypothetically, make life really hard for some of the Wall Street firms that blew up the American economy in 2007 and 2008.
Who could get it: Elizabeth Warren
Getting to know her: The Wall Street watchdog and Massachusetts senator was clear that she didn't want to run for president this time around (despite many entreaties from the left), but that doesn't necessarily mean she wouldn't leave her post in the Senate. Asked by People magazine in 2014 about leading Treasury in a hypothetical Clinton administration, Warren laughed: "Well, that's a fun thought."
Department of Defense
What's the job: The secretary of defense is second behind the president in charge of the U.S. military. A position previously held by many white men who have different shades of white, silver, and gray hair.
Who could get it: Michèle Flournoy.
Getting to know her: Flournoy previously served as undersecretary of defense for policy, which made her the chief adviser to the president's chief adviser on the military, from 2009 to 2012. She is now the CEO of the Center for a New American Security, a nonpartisan think tank on defense and security. Also, Flournoy's mom used to perform at the Copacabana, so, you know, good stock.
Department of Justice
What's the job: The attorney general is like the lawyer for the federal government. She advises the president on, and represents the United States in, legal matters, like access to public facilities for transgender Americans and investigating civil rights abuses in police conduct.
Who could get it: Amy Klobuchar.
Getting to know her: Klobuchar is the senior senator from Minnesota, the first woman elected to the Senate from that state. But before her time in Congress, she spent eight years as the head of the largest prosecutor’s office in Minnesota. The senator met her husband at a pool hall and is rumored, at times, to be even funnier than her colleague, Al Franken.
Alternates: Kamala Harris, Loretta Lynch.
Department of the Interior
What's the job: The secretary of the interior is responsible for overseeing and preserving natural resources and land management. The department is also responsible for honoring the "trust responsibilities or special commitments to American Indians, Alaska Natives, and affiliated island communities," according to its mission statement.
Who could get it: Cathleen Kelly.
Getting to know her: Kelly is a climate expert whose work focuses on sustainable development and climate preparedness and mitigation. She is a senior fellow at the Center for American Progress. She also served on the the Obama administration's Council on Environmental Quality, leading a multi-agency task force on climate change.
Department of Agriculture
What's the job: The secretary of agriculture oversees and makes policy recommendations on food, agriculture, rural development, and nutrition in the United States.
Who could get it: Michelle Obama.
Getting to know her: C'mon, it's Michelle Obama.
Department of Commerce
What's the job: The White House's mission statement describes the secretary of commerce as "the voice of U.S. business." Basically a lower-profile job with responsibilities like working with businesses, universities, and communities to create jobs and grow the economy.
Who could get it: Ursula Burns.
Getting to know her: Until like a month ago, Burns was the first (and only!) black woman to hold the position of CEO at one of America's 500 biggest companies. That was Xerox, where she's still technically employed. But maybe Burns will have a new job soon, one that would make her, once again, the first black woman to hold the position.
Department of Labor
What's the job: The secretary of labor recommends and enforces laws related to American workers, including equitable employment practices, issues related to unions, and the general makings of decent employment.
Who could get it: Ai-Jen Poo.
Getting to know her: Poo is a MacArthur fellow, which is to say an actual genius who can show you the receipts. Poo is the founder and director of the National Domestic Workers Alliance and has spent her career advocating for the rights of domestic and care-taking workers. Considering Clinton's focus on family economics, from childcare to care for the sick, aging, and elderly, Poo makes for a natural fit in the administration. She was included in Time's '100 Most Influential People' back in 2012. True.
Department of Health and Human Services
What's the job: The secretary of health and human services oversees policies and recommendations related to public health and health care. At a moment when the marching orders for a Democratic president would be to expand on the gains made under the Affordable Care Act, this is a big job.
Who could get it: Leana Wen.
Getting to know her: Wen, a former emergency room physician and public health advocate, is the health commissioner of Baltimore. She led the city's efforts to ensure that delivery of health services went uninterrupted during the 2015 protests in response to the death of Freddie Gray, and has been instrumental to the city's effort to combat gun violence and the effects of opioid addiction. Snaps.
Department of Housing and Urban Development
What's the job: The secretary of housing and urban development is responsible for, among other things, ensuring equal and fair access to housing and community development programs.
Who could get it: Shola Olatoye.
Getting to know her: Olatoye is the chairwoman of the New York City Housing Authority, the largest public housing authority in the country. Before joining Mayor Bill de Blasio's administration, Olatoye worked at a nonprofit that developed affordable housing for low-income New Yorkers, and her tenure included a program to find new housing for the thousands of people displaced after Hurricane Sandy.
Department of Transportation
What's the job: The secretary of transportation advises the president on transportation policy, makes recommendations on things like regulating airlines, and ensures that transportation systems aren't being used to transport illegal drugs or alcohol. (Moonshine bootleggers, beware.)
Who could get it: Janette Sadik-Khan.
Getting to know her: Sadik-Khan was controversial as transportation commissioner under the administration of former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, but she was instrumental in making the city a friendlier place for bicyclists and pedestrians.
Department of Energy
What's the job: The secretary of energy is charged with advancing the "national, economic, and energy security of the United States," that can mean everything from harnessing clean energy to cleaning up nuclear waste.
Who could get it: Shirley Ann Jackson.
Getting to know her: Jackson, the first black woman to get Ph.D. from MIT and the second black woman ever to get a Ph.D. in physics in the United States, served as the chairwoman of the United States Nuclear Regulatory Commission during Bill Clinton's administration. She is also a theoretical physicist, which, like, are you?
Department of Education
What's the job: The secretary of education is in charge of federal education policy, from student loans to ensuring that schools comply with nondiscrimination ordinances like Title IX.
Who could get it: Tammy Baldwin.
Getting to know her: Baldwin, the first openly gay senator in U.S. history, is a member of the Committee on Health, Education, Labor and Pensions and has led congressional efforts to address college affordability. She also went to a state school, so she gets it, you know?
Alternates: Michelle Fine.
Department of Veterans Affairs
What's the job: The secretary of veterans affairs administers veteran benefit programs, from housing to health care.
Who could get it: Tammy Duckworth.
Getting to know her: Duckworth, an Illinois congresswoman running for Senate this year, is a veteran herself. She previously served as assistant secretary of veterans affairs. Her work has focused on homelessness among veterans, and the particular needs of women and Native Americans in the armed services.
Department of Homeland Security
What's the job: The secretary of homeland security advises the president on issues of security and counter-terrorism. They're also responsible for disaster preparedness and administering immigration laws.
Who could get it: Claire McCaskill.
Getting to know her: McCaskill, a senator from Missouri, serves on the Senate Homeland Security Committee and is the top-ranking Democrat on the Permanent Subcommittee on Investigations, which, among its other focuses, covers domestic issues related to "crime and lawlessness."
Alternates: Tulsi Gabbard.