While I pop over to Facebook to cancel my 28th birthday party, which would've been this Friday but I now realize is bad and not worth having, check out these photos from the "Daddy Lessons" singer's Monday night celebration. Kendrick's there. Chance is there. The Destiny's Child (3.0) lineup is there. Beyoncé even got Diddy to show up with an elegantly feathered Prince self-titled coiffure. The only people who were gonna show up to my party were my friends, and they look terrible with middle-parts. Birthday party, canceled!
Jay Z and Beyoncé pull up to the New York venue for her Soul Train-themed birthday party (and these are just their arrival looks).
Chance grabs a photo with his Auntie before she changes…
…into THIS. That's "Drunk in Love" producer Detail next to her, by the way.
And here's Jay's throwback look for the night, plus Usher's.
Kelly Rowland was also there. Why hasn't she starred in a Donna Summer biopic yet? I'd even take a shitty Lifetime movie! In fact, I would prefer it.
And before you #PoorMichelle, Ms. Williams was there, too, looking gorgeous.
Same, re: Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz…
…the supermodel stars of the "Yoncé" video (a.k.a., Joan Smalls, Chanel Iman, and Jourdan Dunn) and makeup artist Sir John…
…and Kendrick Lamar, seen here with producer Detail.
In closing, FUCKING LOOK AT DIDDY AND CASSIE.
Bad at filling out bios seeks same.