Donald Trump Actually Did the 'I'm Thankful For Myself' Line

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This year on Thanksgiving I hosted 14 people in a medium-sized New York apartment and successfully cooked or helped cook a turkey, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, a smoked pork shoulder and several other dishes. I’m pretty proud of it, and everyone said I did a good job!


We went around the table at dinner and said what we were thankful for, which is a normal thing that normal people do, and I said the normal things about being thankful for the people at the table and the stuff that they brought or cooked and that they put up with me. I did not say that I was thankful for myself, even though I did a lot this year, because that would be rude. The President, however, made a different decision.

Per the Washington Post:

Asked what he was most thankful for on this Thanksgiving Day — a question that for commanders in chief usually prompts praise of service members in harm’s way — Trump delivered a singularly Trumpian answer.

“I made a tremendous difference in our country,” he said, citing himself.

Hell yeah baby, he did it. He did the “I’m thankful for myself.” Amazing.

Look, there’s a right way and a wrong way to go about this. The wrong way is to go about it on Thanksgiving without really acknowledging anyone else has positively impacted your life. The right way is Snoop Dogg after getting his Hollywood Walk of Fame Star.

You’re getting an award, Snoop, go off! Thank yourself! You deserve it man. Trump was not getting an award.

Later in the morning he did go visit some troops, and offered them a classic deadbeat-uncle bet.

By 11:15 a.m., he had arrived at a nearby Coast Guard station, where he greeted troops and posed for pictures for 14 minutes in a sweltering kitchen, in front of a tray of submarine sandwiches the troops would soon eat for lunch. He served no turkey but told Coast Guard officials there that he would give them $100 if they could break par at his golf course.

Incredible scenes. I’d like to take this time to say that I am thankful to myself for writing this blog.

Contributing Writer, Splinter