Screenshot: Fox & Friends (Twitter)

Whenever President Donald Trump calls into his favorite morning TV show, Fox & Friends, one of two things always happens: Either he offers his usual, low-grade, self-promoting bluster, or he goes completely and irrevocably off the rails in a string of unhinged, and unrelated mini-rants about whatever half-formed thoughts pop into his Frosted Mini-Wheat brain that morning. On Thursday, it was very much the latter.

Trump started his interview by addressing Hurricane Michael, which slammed into the Florida panhandle on Wednesday evening while he was holding a MAGA rally in Pennsylvania.

“It was a speedster,” Trump explained. But, he added, “One thing we had that was to our advantage: this thing was in and out.”

He also promised that, in terms of recovery efforts from the storm, “we’re gonna make it go fast.”

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Asked about his upcoming meeting with Kanye West and former NFL star Jim Brown, Trump bragged that he had “a lot of African American support” (it’s somewhere around 15 percent) particularly among “athletes and stars.” He added that when Kanye first publicly supported his administration, “my polls went up something like 25 percent.”

He also claimed that many celebrities who have spoken out against his administration end up “get[tting] in that booth, they look around, and they press that Trump sticker,” which raises the question of whether the pMassachusettsresident of the United States actually knows how voting works.

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But the president was just getting started.

He attacked the presumptive field of Democratic 2020 presidential candidates—particularly Massachusetts Sen. Elizabeth Warren, about whom he mused, “I have more Indian blood in me than she does, and I have none, unfortunately.”

As for Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders’ Medicare for All plan, Trump—who is the leader of the federal government—insisted that “the government can’t run anything.”

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When asked about former Attorney General Eric Holder’s statement that “when they go low, we kick them,” Trump insisted that his MAGA rallies are “really calm, and packed with people.”

“They used to send in protesters. Paid protesters—the Democrats and Soros, and they came from all over—and we’d have protesters,” he continued. “And I would say this, that it wasn’t so successful for those protesters. But they have to be careful with the rhetoric because it’s very dangerous, what Holder says.”

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As a reminder, Trump used to tell his “really calm” MAGA rally attendees to “knock the crap out of” protesters. But yeah, OK, Holder’s rhetoric is the dangerous stuff here.

As for the midterm elections, Trump continued his potentially counterproductive insistence that Republicans were in good shape come November, saying, “I can tell you that there are Senate races that we weren’t even going to contest that we’re leading in. I could mention names—I won’t.

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“Eeeeeh, maybe I’ll mention one or two,” he then added. “Heidi!!!” he said, referencing North Dakota Sen. Heidi Heitkamp, who’s currently trailing her Republican opponent Kevin Cramer in the polls. Last week, Heitkamp voted against the confirmation of Brett Kavanaugh.

Trump also said that:

Oh, and remember the anonymous “resistance within the Trump administration” op-ed published by the New York Times? Trump said he thinks that “there is a very good chance that that was written by the Times” itself, echoing what Candace Owens of Turning Point USA (the diaper kids) said on the same network last month.

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All of this happened before 9 AM. Just a beautiful start to this lovely morning.