Warner Bros.

It's fitting that Magic Mike XXL is officially being released today, Hump Day. The Male Entertainers with bulging biceps bump and grind against and on top of any and every surface made available to them in the nearly 2-hour romp. No person or object is exempt! Here's the exhaustive list of every single thing that gets humped by the babes of Resurrection (emphasis on the "erection"):

  • Wood shed table
  • Welding tools
  • Chair
  • Jacksonville drag show stage
  • Floor
  • Feathered boa
  • Pepsi fridge
  • Gas station floor
  • Bottle of water
  • Cheetos
  • Matthew McConaughey's ghost
  • A birthday girl
  • A queen who didn't know she was a queen
  • A little bit of Jada Pinkett Smith
  • Some woman's face
  • Some woman's hand
  • Some woman's booty
  • Some woman's torso
  • A full woman


  • The air around 2 women's butts
  • A stack of women
  • Someone's drunk mom
  • The glass slipper
  • Every. Single. Part. Of. The. Myrtle. Beach. Convention. Center.

We are all Elizabeth Banks:


Images via Warner Bros.

Akilah Hughes is a comedian, YouTuber, and staff writer and producer for Fusion's culture section. You can almost always find her waxing poetic about memes and using too many emojis. 🍕