“Time for some traffic problems in Fort Lee”
- Bridget Anne Kelly, 7:34 a.m., August 13 2013
Those eight words will live forever in the history books, marking the defining moment of the massive political scandal, now known as Bridgegate, involving New Jersey Governor Chris Christie (explainer here).
In this week’s New Yorker, reporter Ryan Lizza documents the origins of the email, sent by Kelly, Christie’s deputy chief of staff, to David Wildstein, an insider at the Port Authority. Lizza’s profile, "“Crossing Christie,” is a #longread that everyone is talking about, and is worth checking out in full.
As a supplement to Lizza’s lengthy profile, we’ve decided to hone in on the eight infamous words that changed everything.
The phrase “Time for some traffic problems in Fort Lee” is great for a number of reasons, first being its versatility. It can and should be used frequently in conversation. Much like Shakespeare’s “All the world’s a stage” and Charlie Sheen’s “WINNING,” it’s time to incorporate “traffic problems in Fort Lee” into our daily lexicon.
Here are four ways in which to use our new phrase:
1) To foreshadow an issue or impending controversy
Scenario: You see an Instagram photo of your best friend’s boyfriend posing in a hot tub surrounded by swimsuit models.
In a sentence: “Once Jessica sees that Instagram there’s going to be some major traffic problems in Fort Lee.”
Note: "Jessica" does not exist and this is not her boyfriend. He is a rich, crazy poker player who is Insta-famous
2) In anticipation of a big night
Scenario: It’s your first night on vacation in Miami. You get a bunch of #molly and other treats.
In a sentence: “Lil Jon is playing at LIV. Get ready for some traffic in Fort Lee tonight!”
Photo via RapGenius
3) Post-party; hungover
Scenario: The morning after Lil Jon concert at LIV; you wake up fully clothed and multiple water cups (hangover prevention) surround your bed.
In a sentence: “Today is going to be more miserable than a traffic jam in Fort Lee.”
4) A coded way to discuss physical issues
Scenario: After fourth meal at Taco Bell.
In a sentence: “Time for some traffic problems in Ft. Lee. Issuing a flash flood warning or major blockage.”
These are only suggested uses. We encourage you to get creative.
Alexandra DiPalma is a producer for Fusion Lightworks, Fusion’s In-house Branded Content Agency.