Image: AP

Suffering is part of what it means to be alive and there is no way to fully shield our loved ones against it, but that does not mean you have to go and introduce your child to a terrible shithead.

Here are some things the president of the United States said to some children on Friday because their parents, members of the press, brought them to the White House:

“She is Japanese? Beautiful. She is Japane—I’m gonna be in Japan in two weeks. I’ll be in Japan.”

“You have no weight problems. That’s the good news, right?”

“You gonna grow up to be like your parents? Mmmm... don’t answer.”

“They can stay. The parents? Maybe not so much.”

Maybe not so much.