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What are we reading this morning? Take a look for yourself. Here's a link dump to go with that cup o' joe:

Chicago man launches Kickstarter campaign to raise $8 for a Chipotle burrito, has currently raised $191 and counting.

Ken Burns is releasing an app on iTunes because apparently making documentaries for PBS isn't lucrative enough.

"Flappy Bird" creator said he took down the game because it was addictive. Don't flatter yourself, guy. Your crappy game isn't/wasn't crack!

But, if you fear you missed out on this short-lived game, don't worry because there's already an alternative: Flappy Doge

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GIF BREAK!

Former Jeopardy! champion Ken Jennings finally speaks out on Daily Double-hunting Arthur Chu. His comments will change the way you look at Alex Trebek forever (shut up, Upworthy-like sentence, no they won't!)

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For a country founded by Puritans, America sure is kinky. According to Durex study, citizens of the United States are more into BDSM than in other countries.

I thought "Dumb Starbucks" was…well, dumb, but now that Nathan Fielder is behind it, I'm all for it. If you haven't seen his brilliant show then… well, I just don't know what to do with you.

Don't get it twisted in front of Samuel L. Jackson:

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I don't know what to be more excited about, the fact that there's a slideshow gallery of goats wearing sweaters or that there's a website called Modern Farmer.

"Is Amazon bad for books?," asks pretentious magazine The New Yorker.

Fidel Martinez is an editor at Fusion.net. He's also a Texas native and a lifelong El Tri fan.