This week, a French magazine called Oops! made headlines when Leonardo DiCaprio, America's premier model conservationist, successfully sued the publication for alleging in a May cover story that he had impregnated Rihanna. (For the record, he has not impregnated Rihanna.)
As you might guess from its title, the bimonthly gossip rag isn't exactly known for its rigorous, meticulously fact-checked reporting. Nevertheless, we've discovered that it's a valuable teaching tool for aspiring francophones. Imagine a special edition of Rosetta Stone devoted to cheating, drug addiction, and other celebrity scandals.
Here are eight memorable Oops! covers with the lurid vocabulary translated into English—purely for educational purposes, of course.
1. Bientôt [adverb]: Soon. "George Clooney: Soon to be a dad!"
2. Enceinte [adjective]: Pregnant. "Rihanna: Pregnant by Leonardo!"
3. Coming-out [noun]: Coming out. "Miley Cyrus: The coming out."
4. Reconnaître [verb]: Recognize. "He will not recognize the baby…"
1. Travesti [noun]: Transvestite. "Daniel Radcliffe very close to a transvestite."
2. Trompé [verb]: Cheated on. "Angelina: She cheated on Brad with a woman…"
3, 4. Choc [noun, adjective]: Shock. "The shock photos that could destroy her marriage," "The first shock photos."
1. Trisomique [adjective]: Having Down syndrome. "Eva Longoria: 'My sister has Down syndrome.'"
2. Femme battue [noun phrase]: Battered woman. "Lio: 'I was a battered woman.'"
3. Tué [verb]: Killed. "Charlize Theron: 'My mother killed my father.'"
4. SDF [adjective]: Homeless. "Halle Berry: 'I was homeless.'"
5. Née [verb]: Born. "Leighton Meester: 'I was born in prison!'"
6. Poignarder [verb]: Stab. "Rihanna: 'My father tried to stab me…'"
1. Amoureux [noun]: Lovers. "Harry and Pippa: Lovers in secret."
2. Plaqué [verb]: Ditched. "He ditched Chelsy for Pippa."
3. Frappée [verb]: Hit. "It's my fault if Chris Brown hit me."
4. Sort avec [verb phrase]: Go out with. "She goes out with a footballer."
1. Reconquérir [verb]: To win back. "Kristen Stewart: Her plan to win back Rob."
2. Coquine [adjective]: Naughty. "The naughty investigation."
3. Copine [noun]: Girlfriend. "My clash with Thomas' girlfriend."
4. Sexe [noun]: Sex. "The stars and sex!"
5. Dieu au lit [noun phrase]: God in bed. "Katy Perry: She goes out with Jennifer Aniston's ex! (and he's a god in bed)."
1. Infidèle [adjective]: Unfaithful. "How unfaithful are you?"
2. Craqué pour [verb phrase]: Fell for. "Morgan fell for Zarko!"
3. Mourir [verb]: To die. "Amy knew she was going to die."
4. L'enterrement de vie de jeune fille [noun phrase]: Bachelorette party. "Kim Kardashian: Nice, the bachelorette party!"
1. Fière [adjective]: Proud. "Beyoncé: Too proud of being pregnant!"
2. Accros [adjective]: Addicted.
3. Bistouri [noun]: Knife. "These stars are addicted to the knife…"
4. À poil [adjective phrase]: Stark naked. "Russell Brand arrested stark naked!"
1. Enfer [noun]: Hell. "Katy Perry's parents: 'Our daughter is going to Hell!'"
2. Grossesse [noun]: Pregnancy. "The pregnancy they didn't expect."
Molly Fitzpatrick is senior editor of Fusion's Pop & Culture section. Her interests include movies about movies, TV shows about TV shows, and movies about TV shows, but not so much TV shows about movies.