Melania Trump Invents Fake Critics of Her Anti-Bullying Campaign and Vows to Defeat Them

Today, First Lady Melania Trump brought tech industry leaders together to discuss a Very Important Issue affecting our nation’s precious children: cyberbullying. To Trump’s credit, it appears she did so with a completely straight face.

At the anti-cyberbullying event (invitees included folks from Amazon, Twitter, Google, and Facebook), Trump took a moment to address the POTUS-sized elephant in the room—kind of.

It’s probably safe to say that people take less issue with Melania Trump’s unflinching dedication to addressing cyberbullying and more with the crude and brutish cyberbully to whom she is married. And also maybe her several other demonstrations of flawless hypocrisy. The White House certainly has a penchant for making the country choke on painfully obvious and tragic irony, but if they try to spin this cyberbullying thing any harder, we’re bound to get vertigo as well.