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C'mon now. The guacamole is supposed to come after you get high.

Police in Illinois found more than a ton of marijuana last week hidden away in packages of frozen avocado pulp.


Workers at a cold storage facility in the Cook County village of Lyon called police after they noticed a suspicious package, NBC Chicago reports. The authorities brought over drug-sniffing dogs, who weren't fooled by the creamy disguise.

Credit: Cook County Sheriff's Office

Authorities estimate the seized weed has a street value of $10 million, so someone must be very sad.


Chicago police took young people to "black site" for marijuana crimes

An investigative report by the Guardian last month brought to light allegations of wrongdoing at Homan Square, a warehouse used by the Chicago police to hold suspects who reportedly endured beatings and shacklings, as well as being denied access to lawyers.

The Guardian now reports that marijuana crimes landed two people in the controversial lockup for hours, where they claim they were denied access to phone calls and attorneys.


One arrestee, who declined to give her name for publication, told the media outlet she was cuffed to a metal bar in a cell for 12 hours — while police on the outside initially told her family members they didn't know her whereabouts.

Her alleged crime? Authorities found an ounce of marijuana in her car.

This reporter had the anti-Maureen Dowd experience

New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd secured a place for herself in the marijuana amateur Hall of Fame last year when she ate too much of a cannabis-infused chocolate bar in her Denver hotel room and then "curled up in a hallucinatory state for the next eight hours."


She was upset with what she thought was inadequate labeling about the strength of the product. Apparently, however, the complaint goes both ways.

A reporter from Marketplace recounts a visit to Colorado last year, where he tried a "tincture" — concentrated cannabis in liquid form, which you consume using a dropper placed under the tongue.

He liked the flavor (spearmint), but not the result — he didn't get high.

"I got the anti-Dowd effect," wrote reporter Charles Passy. "But when you think about it, I had the same problem as Dowd in that I couldn’t get a handle on the correct dosage. Dowd ended up feeling like a zombie. I ended up feeling like I got ripped off (the drops cost me 20 bucks). But it’s an issue either way."


Passy said the product wasn't labeled clearly enough for him to figure out an adequate dose. He didn't want to get a Dowd-level buzz, but he didn't want to be stone-cold sober, either.

Colorado has since set stricter guideline for how companies should package and label their edibles. He says the same tincture product now has a line on the dropper to help give an unknowing consumer a bit more guidance about what's a reasonable dosage.

Ted Hesson was formerly the immigration editor at Fusion, covering the issue from Washington, D.C. He also writes about drug laws and (occasionally) baseball. On the side: guitars, urban biking, and fiction.