President Brain Worms Calls Apple's CEO 'Tim Apple'

Illustration for article titled President Brain Worms Calls Apples CEO Tim Apple
Screenshot: The White House/YouTube

At a meeting of the American Workforce Policy Advisory Board today, President Donald Trump, our big wet boy, was speaking to Apple CEO Tim Cook when he deployed an interesting rhetorical flourish, according to CNET.


“We’re going to be opening up the labor forces because we have to. We have so many companies coming in,” Trump said. “People like Tim—you’re expanding all over and doing things that I really wanted you to do right from the beginning. I used to say, ‘Tim, you gotta start doing it here,’ and you really have you’ve really put a big investment in our country. We really appreciate it very much, Tim Apple.”

That’s right. Tim Apple.

Don’t worry, there’s video.

Zero reaction from Ivanka or Tim Apple himself.

The moment followed a skin-crawling exchange earlier in the meeting between Ivanka Trump and her father, in which she referred to him as “Mr. President” before he grabbed her hand and said playfully “She’s so formal!” Euuugghhh.


This isn’t the first time Trump has used this unique mnemonic strategy. He once called Lockheed Martin CEO Marillyn Hewson “Marillyn Lockheed.” Trump, like a small child, seems to replace all last names with what he thinks the person does. Look out in the future for him referring to “Howie Starbucks” and “Bernie Socialism.”

Thank you Donald President. You truly are making America great again.

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