President of the United States Stunned to Discover Job Is Difficult

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Welcome to WHAT NOW, a morning round-up of the news/fresh horrors that await you today.


President Donald Trump is apparently surprised that running a country is hard, and misses his old life as a full-time rich orange man.

“I loved my previous life. I had so many things going,” Trump said in an interview with Reuters published Friday. “This is more work than in my previous life. I thought it would be easier.”


He’s also not a fan of the “cocoon” of protection that 24-hour Secret Service detail has placed around him, a complaint Trump shares with many previous presidents.

Trump, who apparently likes driving, said he also misses that trapping of regular life-dom.

“I like to drive,” he said. “I can’t drive any more.”

But the bleakest moment of the interview came when the president interrupted a discussion of China to hand out electoral maps showing the latest election results to each of the three Reuters reporters present.


“Here, you can take that, that’s the final map of the numbers,” Trump said, reportedly handing out U.S. maps colored blue and red. “It’s pretty good, right? The red is obviously us.”


  • Arkansas executed its fourth death row inmate in a week on Thursday night as part of the state’s frenzied effort to use up a lethal injection drug hitting its expiration date. Witnesses told reporters that Kenneth Williams, 38, was “coughing, convulsing, lurching, jerking, with sound” and “clearly trying to draw in air” before he died.
  • Because we can’t have one goddamn night of rest without actively worrying about nuclear war, Trump also told Reuters that there is “absolutely” a chance of a “major, major conflict with North Korea.”
  • Saturday marks Trump’s 100th day in office. In that time, Trump and members of his administration have publicly lied about everything from Time magazine and microwaves to Hitler and the crime rate. Here are just 100 of them, which BuzzFeed rounded up to mark the occasion.


  • Saturday marks the 25th anniversary of the Los Angeles uprising, sparked after the acquittal of four police officers caught on tape brutally beating Rodney King.


  • A very good trending topic on Twitter: #FyreFestival, where attendees were apparently duped into paying between $4,000 and $12,000 for a luxury music and food fest in the Bahamas and received unfinished tests, no security, and an all-around Lord of the Flies-esque experience. At least they’re gaining invaluable survival skills.

Managing Editor, Splinter

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