If you've ever had a roommate, you probably have a horror story. That's to be expected when sharing a living space with a complete stranger. And at this point in the school year, the roomie honeymoon phase is coming to an end and your bunkmate's true colors start shining through.
Sure, at first, Jack seemed like a regular guy with a penchant for unhealthy delivery food.
That was before the sex scarecrow filled with Chinese noodles popped up.
But roommate horror stories are a two way street. Because somewhere out there, your former roommate is telling a room full of people about the time he walked in on you, laying in his bed, dressed in all his clothes.
So instead of bitching about the indiscretions of former housemates, let's use this time to think: what's the worst thing you ever did to your roommate?
Here are some confessions from Whisper, the anonymous secret-sharing app, to get you started. Each will be placed into one of three categories (explained below): "Perfect Strangers," "The Odd Couple" and "Single White Female".
1) Perfect Strangers
These roomie hijinks are TGIF-friendly, good-natured and/or well-deserved, and are intended to cause minimal harm. Think passed-out body art, or feeding Cousin Larry's keys to a goat.
*unclear on how this is possible
2) The Odd Couple
These Oscar and Felix moments are mostly just sweet and good natured, and barely count as pranks. Dropping a toothbrush on the ground and not washing it? If these are the worst things you've ever done, I'd like to have you as a roommate.
3) Single White Female
Treading into purely psychotic territory, the perpetrators of these roommate crimes should seek help immediately. If you can relate to any of the confessions in this category, you are not fit to live with another human being and should be locked up or stabbed to death by Bridget Fonda.
For more roommate confessions, try Whisper here.
Alexandra DiPalma is a producer for Fusion Lightworks, Fusion’s In-house Branded Content Agency.