Rudy Giuliani, a ghoulish husk of a man with bottom teeth that resemble the tombstones in a haunted graveyard, sat down with CNN’s Chris Cuomo on Monday night and insisted with a straight face that members of Donald Trump’s legal team were NOT lying when they falsely claimed the president wasn’t involved in drafting a statement in response to his idiot son’s now-infamous meeting with Russian operatives at Trump Tower.
Instead, Giuliani—an actual attorney who is actually paid to represent actual clients—asked us to just cut him a little slack for this big ol’ goof. Whoopsie!
“You think maybe someone could have made a mistake?” Giuliani asked Cuomo, when asked why the President’s legal team clearly and obviously lied about his involvement in the post-Trump Tower statement.
“This is a complex investigation,” Giuliani said, presumably fighting the overwhelming urge to mention 9/11.
He went on:
First week or so, I got a few things wrong. Then it was clarified in a letter, and that’s the final position. That’s the danger of going under oath—you can make a mistake, and if you want to, you can say it’s a lie. It was a mistake. I swear to God, it was a mistake!
Giuliani was presumably referring to his very rocky first week on the job, when he magnificently blew a softball Fox News interview by saying Trump knowingly reimbursed Michael Cohen for paying off Stormy Daniels and admitted the president fired former FBI Director James Comey over the Russia probe.
See, folks? The president’s crack legal squad of high-powered, exorbitantly paid, world-class attorneys just made (another) little whoopsie! But look, boo-boos happen, right? Let’s forget about the oopses of the past, say sorry, and move on. No lies here, no sir, no way.
Case closed!