Surprise! Anastasia's 'landscaping' was computer generated

Dearest friends, everything I ever believed in is a lie.

When Fifty Shades of Grey hit theaters last month, I announced to the world (or Fusion readers, anyway) that the only redeeming part of the movie was the fact that Anastasia sported a full, moderately tamed look down under—a natural look.

Her pubic situation was a beacon of hope—like the force of the moon, her hair down there seemed to mark shifting tides in a sea of Brazilian waxes and laser hair removal. Perhaps bush really was back! Perhaps waxing was waning.

I did assume Dakota Johnson’s protagonist was wearing a pubic merkin, but what I did not expect was that the merkin was computer generated. That’s right—straight up CGI. As The New York Times revealed in a piece about the art of filming sex scenes, Anastasia’s pubic hair was a product of careful postproduction editing.  Here’s cinematographer Seamus McGarvey describing how he pulled of the pubic ruse.

“We were protecting the actors. Jamie [Dornan] had a cover over his penis. Dakota [Johnson] had kind of a patch that went over her pubic area, and right round her whole body. We were in the curious situation, in postproduction, of adding [pubic hair]. I wouldn’t say it was one of the highlights of my career, but it certainly was one of the most surreal scenarios. We did have a butt double for Dakota. I had the pleasure of casting a nontattooed bottom — Surreal Scenario No. 2.”

Photoshop strikes again.

Don’t get me wrong, I still think that—CGI or not—Anastasia’s full landscaping should be celebrated, particularly given that it appeared in such a mainstream and successful movie. However, I cannot help but mourn. Those pubes weren’t real (or even artificial, in the real-world sense). They were simply the imaginings of an extremely talented computer graphics artist.