Illustration for article titled Ted Cruz Ruins iLegally Blonde 3/i Two Years Before It Even Comes Out
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Have you heard the good news? Elle Woods is headed back to the big screen in just two short years, when MGM is set to release the third installment of its massively successful Legally Blonde series on Feb. 14, 2020.

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And if you think you’re excited, well step aside pal, ‘cuz there’s room for just one LB superfan in this town, and his name is Rafael Edward “Ted” Cruz.

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Okay, now technically it’s Cruz’s wife that’s the superfan. Ted seems more excited about the prospect of “date night.” Unfortunately, this means we can reasonably assume that exactly 616 days from today, ol’ Zodiac himself will be having—you know what? I can’t even say it. (Please feel free to run to the nearest bathroom to barf as necessary.)

As excited as we might be for Legally Blonde 3, I think we can agree: Knowing it might lead to Ted Cruz getting his disgusting bone on is frankly too high a price.

Senior writer. When in doubt he'll have the soup.

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