The Very Best and Not at All Sad or Pathetic Parts of Bill O'Reilly's New Podcast

Last week, Bill O’Reilly was forced out at Fox News because Rupert Murdoch’s sons want to buy the remaining shares of a British satellite television company and fostering an alleged sexual predator and serial abuser for more than a decade had reportedly become a hiccup.

So now O’Reilly is a full-time podcaster, baby!

“This is an extended Talking Points Memo that will cover the world each day,” O’Reilly says on the first episode of “No Spin News” to air since he returned from the “pre-planned vacation” that just happened to directly precede his ouster from the company. He never came back from the vacation, but it was a still a vacation. He met the Pope. Vacation.

Anyway, it’s going to be a good podcast. Lots of cool stuff happening here:

And then as we develop the website, we’ll have guests and things like that, and this will become longer and longer and longer, into a genuine news program.

Doing great. And soon, the website is going to look really great, too. The website is not great right now but “right now” is not forever, you know? Ha ha, great.

Where were we? Oh. Is he sad that he’s not on television anymore?

I am sad that I’m not on television anymore.

So that’s real, and “No Spin News” is a place to be real. The podcast is not television. But the podcast is also similar to television. Some of the things from the television show will be part of the podcast, even:

We’re going to read letters off the message boards. So, if you’re a premium member, that’s going to be like the viewer mail, the message boards.

Now again, he is fine. He can tell you that much! But do you know who isn’t fine? President Trump. He is getting a lot of negative publicity right now. The press is out to get him. He is a man trying to do his job, but there are forces conspiring to bring him down. O’Reilly, who is fine, can’t relate, but he has some advice:

So, the president needs to be a little more… don’t react to these polls… a little more circumspect. The base, for him, is still there, and not discouraged. The majority of Americans still prefer him over Hillary Clinton to run the country. I mean, these are coming out of the Washington Post and liberal precincts.

Now there is more news:

Now, there are a couple of big stories this week, so I hope you stay with us on these broadcasts so you can stay up to date.

Are you still listening? If you want the big stories, you have to keep listening. Maybe set back your computer’s sleep mode so that the audio keeps playing even if you walk away from the computer. Sleep mode. It’s under “system preferences” when you click the apple icon in the corner. No? OK. Maybe flag it for your granddaughter next time she comes over. Has she been over recently? It’s fine.

Anyway:

The next story that caught my eye concerns our pal, Ann Coulter. She is supposed to speak at UC Berkeley–a place I would never in a million years go to. That means that Ann Coulter is a much braver person than I am. She’s set to speak there, but they don’t want her to speak there—the snowflakes, you know.

You know! OK, that’s the news. Time to wrap up. To the message boards! Have you seen them? They will look even better after the redesign. Write on the message boards. Please:

People writing in, we want to encourage that. We’ll do it every day. Whatever you want to know, I’ll try to answer.

Questions, questions, more questions. Wow, lots of happy subscribers on the message boards. OK, here’s one. Is O’Reilly mad about being forced out of Fox News? No way:

Look, I was there for twenty years and six months. We made history, put cable news on the map and were successful all that time. No ebb and flow, just straight up graph. You know, that vehicle was fabulous for me and I said in the beginning that I’m sad, but why wouldn’t I wish them the best? They were there, we performed well for them, and that’s the fact.

And now Richard, who doesn’t “always agree” with O’Reilly but nevertheless remains one of the satisfied customers who have signed up for BillOreilly.com Premium Membership so that he can keep enjoying “No Spin News,” a subscription-only podcast that is a lot like the television show “The O’Reilly Factor.” You liked the show, right?

Well, I appreciate that, Richard. When you disagree with me–and this is very important for all the BillOReilly.com listeners–please post on the Message Boards. Let me know. I’m not always right. We like to hear from you guys, you’re the bedrock of the country. I’m just the messenger.

Just the messenger doing his podcast. And doing fine:

So I hope you enjoyed the first edition of the No Spin News, and I hope it wasn’t boring. If we can improve it, let us know in the Message Boards, because we are ramping up this week. And, you know, this is all new, and we’ll get better, and we’ll get pithier, and we’ll have a lot of fun going forward.