This Ghoulish Statue of Melania Trump Is Perfect

Usually when you read stories about celebrity statues, it’s because they’re insulting to the person they depict. (See: Lucille Ball, Cristiano Ronaldo). But every so often, you get a statue that utterly captures the soul of its subject; a rendering so flawless it looks more real than the person themselves. This Melania Trump statue, erected in the First Lady’s home country of Slovenia, is one such statue.

According to ITV, U.S. artist Brade Downey hired a local craftsman Ales Zupevc to create the tribute to Melania near her hometown of Sevnica, and I have to say, he did a hell of a job. The way her blue smock swallows her flailing hands like an infant’s too-large onesie. The rough-hewn hunk of hair clinging to her head as though frightened. The filthy, blackened shins, which first descend into cankles before vanishing into a morass of militaristic blue boots.

And her face! The rage pulsating from her ogreish eyes say everything’s the real Melania’s can’t; namely, “I am so pissed this is my life.” A mouth that all but spells out the words “I really don’t care. Do u?”

Sevnica residents don’t seem to care for the statue, but that’s surely because they just don’t understand it.

“It doesn’t look anything like Melania,” said one local. “It’s a Smurfette. It’s a disgrace.”

“It’s not okay. It’s a disgrace. That’s what I have to say,” said another.

What these residents don’t get is that the Melania statue isn’t a disgrace at all. It’s exactly as it should be.