There must have been some kind of off-the-record conference call last night, where governors in the country decided to band together in the most horrible way imaginable.
Today Republican governors came out, one by one, stating that they would under no circumstances allow for Syrian refugees to be housed within their borders, citing last Friday's terrorist attack in Paris, and the retrieval of a mysterious Syrian passport on the scene as their justification.
As of now, at least 17 governors have made the pledge.
There's just one problem with this grand idea, though. States don't control immigration, and they damn sure don't control refugee claims. In a post that was apparently published on his private Facebook account, Minnesota State Rep. Pat Garafalo subtly reminded his fellow GOP members of this, with a perfect response to the day's hypothetical:
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: At the risk of stating the painfully obvious, please allow me to remind Facebook that refugees are granted access to a nation, not a state. Governors cannot control who enters their state. If state government could control who enters their state, I would immediately require Minnesota to refuse entry to: A) anyone who opposes immunizing children. B) people who think the landing on the moon was a hoax and C) whoever was responsible for the Vikings trade for Herschel Walker in 1989.
The private announcement was shared on Twitter by Rachel Stassen-Berger, who writes for the St. Paul Pioneer Press. I've reached out to the representative to verify that he is the one who typed out these wise words (judging from his matching tweet on the subject, it's probably him).
Thanks for your service to humanity, Rachel. And thank you for your wise words, Mr. Garafalo. Please accept my friend request. I can use some more humor like your in these depressing times.
Daniel Rivero is a producer/reporter for Fusion who focuses on police and justice issues. He also skateboards, does a bunch of arts related things on his off time, and likes Cuban coffee.