Toronto student newspaper blasts open two-ply toilet-paper conspiracy

Inequality is as bad as it’s ever been in this world of ours, and it’s never been more obvious than in the bathrooms of the 13th and 14th floors of Jorgensen Hall on the Ryerson University campus. These floors house the most prestigious employees on campus, including the president’s office, alumni relations, and the finance department. In other words: the elite of the elite. The 1%. The gatekeepers of our society.

And—no surprise—they’re living in luxury. The Ryerson student newspaper, The Eyeopener, took a little trip up to those 13th and 14th floors, and headed to the bathrooms, and found—you guessed it—two-ply toilet paper. Rest of the campus? One-ply. Via The Eyeopener:

Ryerson President Sheldon Levy’s office is also on the thirteenth floor, just steps away from the two-ply supplied bathroom.

But Levy finds the toilet paper distribution “frustrating.”

“When I found out about this on day one, I said this is shocking, embarrassing, make sure this doesn’t happen,” Levy said.

It’d cost the campus about $80,000 a year to convert to all two-ply; a worthwhile cause for the revolution, no doubt.

The intrepid reporter of the story, Lauren Woodward, recounted to the Toronto Star the great lengths required to get the scoop.

To find out, she called every toilet paper distributor in Toronto and discovered one of them did indeed supply Ryerson with two-ply paper. Woodward then approached the school’s facilities department. When she told them she would file an access-to-information request, she says a university spokesperson contacted her and revealed the toilet paper truth: some people get two-ply; most scrape by with the thinner stuff.