The president then widened his focus to the Times itself, insisting the paper should “get down on their knees & beg for forgiveness,” which is definitely a normal and not at all worrying thing for a person to demand from a newspaper.

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Times-bashing taken care of, Trump moved on to more important things, like hyping his next MAGA rally:

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Complaining about his favorite boogeymen:

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And waxing nostalgic about the “old days” when no one would dare criticize the president.

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Then it was time for an unsolicited plug for his favorite TV show, followed by an attack on his former bestie:

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(Scarborough, for his part, responded immediately with the cable news equivalent of a Mean Girls GIF.)

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Wheeeee!

OK, time for a quick check in on the motorcycle industry:

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And then back to the important business at hand—being Extremely Online:

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Aaaaaaaaaaaaand fin.

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Wow, what a journey.