Trump Brain Status: CAN YOU HEAR ME?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Screenshot: Fox Business
Trump Brain StatusTrump Brain StatusDispatches from the cursed interior of Donald Trump’s overripe melon.

Hours before a scheduled flight to the G20 summit in Japan, President Donald Trump got down to the real business of the day: Calling in to Fox Business Network to ramble and YELL and ramble and SHOUT and ramble.

Trump covered any number of his personal bugbears with FBN host Maria Bartiromo—who could barely squeeze a word in between his manic soliloquies—including Federal Reserve chair Jerome Powell (fire him!), big tech companies (sue ‘em!), and Japan (screw ‘em!).

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Trump complained about his Twitter account, which he claimed wasn’t accruing followers as much as it used to.

“Twitter is terrible, what they do,” he said. “They don’t let you get the word out— I’ve had so many people come to me, ‘Sir I can’t join you on Twitter.’” He also said he might sue Google and Facebook “and all that.”

Trump also attacked his hand-picked Fed chairman Jerome Powell as “not doing a good job.”

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On the international front, Trump continued his recent trend of threatening to leave Japan hanging in the event of an attack from a foreign country.

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“If Japan is attacked we will fight World War III,” Trump complained. “We will go in and we will protect them and we will fight with our lives and with our treasure.”

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But, Trump whined, if the U.S. were attacked, Japanese citizens would can simply “watch it on a Sony television.” Presumably this is something that Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe will have some questions about when Trump lands in Japan later tonight.

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About the author

Rafi Schwartz

Senior writer. When in doubt he'll have the soup.