Trump campaign speech in Florida was exactly what you expected, except with more shouting and sweat

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With less than a month in the White House, a perspiring President Donald Trump fled the turmoil of Washington to deliver a campaign speech Saturday to thousands of his most vocal supporters, who quickly took to Twitter at hashtag #Melbourne to express uncompromised love and adoration for 45.

With Air Force One optimally positioned in the background at Orlando Melbourne International Airport—despite it being only a two–hour drive from Trump’s private Mar-a-Lago resort—Trump bombastically reiterated his usual talking points as of late: fake news, the media lies (on this point, Trump sees himself as Thomas Jefferson, Andrew Jackson and Abraham Lincoln, by the way), women voters love him, Chicago sucks, and Obama left him One. Big. Mess. Folks, you just wouldn’t even believe.


Oh, and the White House is running smoothly. “So smoothly.”

Many of Trump’s standard zingers—particularly the ones where he promises to kick people out of the country—predictably drew a raucous response from the 9,000 people gathered at the airport hangar rally, where temperatures were in the 80s.

Gang members and drug dealers who right now as I speak are being thrown out of the country and they will not be let back in,” Trump bellowed. “The gang members, bad, bad people. I said it…Get ’em the hell outta here. Bring ’em back to where they came from.”

And the Muslims: “I’ve taken action to keep radical Islamic terrorism the hell out of the country,” Trump said, repeating yet again a meritless justification for his unconstitutional attempt at a Muslim ban.


Cue the attack on judges: “And I listened to these judges talk and talk and talk. So unfair.”

The good news is that with 1,353 days left until the 2020 presidential election, there’ll be plenty of time to enjoy that “new day” that’s coming in America. Because as Trump noted, “we don’t win anymore. We’re going to start winning again.”


We’ll be waiting, Mr. Trump. Any day now.

If you missed it and just can’t get enough of Trump, here’s the entire speech, including First Lady Melania Trump’s unique rendition of the Lord’s Prayer:

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