Trump Extremely on His 'BULLSHIT' Today

Please, dear reader, I ask—no beg of—you to explain the logic behind when President Donald Trump chooses to swear. Because honestly, I do not get it.

Here is a tweet Trump sent out shortly after House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Intelligence Committee Chair Rep. Adam Schiff finished a press conference to update the public on the state of their ongoing impeachment inquiry:

Uh oh, he said the “shit” word! Better go get grandma’s pearls—it’s clutchin’ time, folks!

Minutes later, during an Oval Office sit down with Finnish President Sauli Niinistö, Trump was decidedly more careful with his language, lashing out at Schiff by saying he’s unfit to carry Secretary of State Mike Pompeo’s “blank strap.” (The word he was looking for was probably “jock.”)

Unpack this for me: Shit is OK, but jockstap isn’t? What is going on here? And before you tell me that Trump is careful not to violate the precious sanctity of the Oval Office with his locker room talk, I would point you to this report, which claims Trump berated his staff in that very room this past March by telling them they had made him look like “a fucking idiot.”

Where is the logic? I know the president’s brain is a soggy mush of conspiracy theories and racist grievances, but for the love of god, at least he could be consistent in this one, extremely specific, instance. Is that so much to ask? I’m just so tired of all this bullshit.