Photo: AP

Donald Trump achieved something rare on Friday morning: He accidentally did two good tweets about former FBI Director James Comey, whose takedown book about Trump and Washington is set to be released on Tuesday.

Yes, the meltdown has arrived. Trump kicked off the morning by tweeting:

A few things to note:

  • Trump, a man who probably knows a thing or two about “botch jobs” (whatever that means), says Comey royally messed up the handling of the Hillary Clinton email probe in the months before the 2016 election. Show me the lie there!
  • The idea that people in Washington would abandon a position the second it proved wildly unpopular? Unthinkable!
  • Finally: Did it take Trump 16 minutes to come up with “slime ball” or did he get distracted? We may never know!

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What we do know, based on reports from outlets who’ve gotten their hands on Comey’s book, is that his account is a slobbering tome, with misty-eyed moments like Obama reassuring him, after the firing, that he’s still talented and good, coupled with lame shots like John Kelly calling Trump “dishonorable.” Who cares!!

Here’s how CNN described Comey’s treatment of Trump in the book this morning (emphasis added):

He painted Trump as a relentless liar who is obsessively unethical, devoid of humanity and a slave to his ego, who is clueless about his job and unconcerned about a Russian assault on American democracy.

Jabbing the President in a strikingly personal way, Comey noted the size of Trump’s hands, said his skin looked orange and described white rings around his eyes from tanning goggles.

But Comey isn’t just out to hurt Trump’s feelings. He is on a more profound mission: His book is a parable about the threat from a brazen President who demands a warped concept of loyalty and has only disdain for the rule of law.

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Ah, the “rule of law,” that secular god we all know and love. So far, it’s sounding like everyone will get what they came for from this book: #Resistance fighters will find the brave leader they were looking for in Comey, Democrats will get all hot and bothered about the grave concerns Comey raises about Trump’s downplaying the RUSSIAN THREAT, and everyone else can laugh forever at a man who defended torture typing the words “golden shower.”