Photo: Michael Reynolds (Getty)

Televangelist, evangelical pastor, and spiritual adviser to Donald Trump Paula White would like the world to know that not only are the undocumented children imprisoned in federal detention facilities actually doing quite well for themselves, but Jesus Christ himself probably would have wanted them locked up.

In an interview with the Christian Broadcast Network this week, White—who serves as a member of Trump’s Spiritual Advisory Committee—described her recent visit to the Youth For Tomorrow child detention center in Bristow, VA, which has housed both unaccompanied immigrant children as well as those torn from their families under the administration’s separation policy.

“It is beyond phenomenal,” White gushed. “Not just three square meals [but] psychiatric care, clinician, medical care, chapel, events, schooling, language, love.”

Wow, sounds like a great place!... for a children’s prison. (In nearby Staunton, VA, for instance, immigrant teens at a different facility have alleged years of physical, and mental abuse.)

When asked whether her visit called to mind any biblical scripture, White made one hell of a pivot:

I think so many people have taken biblical scriptures out of context on this, to say stuff like, ‘Well, Jesus was a refugee.’ Yes, He did live in Egypt for three-and-a-half years. But it was not illegal. If He had broken the law then He would have been sinful and He would not have been our Messiah.

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Ah yes, noted rule-follower Jesus, who was adored by the governing Romans for not rocking the boat and definitely didn’t ruffle any legal feathers. This checks out.

White concluded her interview by insisting that having seen children locked in a detention facility, she’s come to the inescapable conclusion that we’re on the right track.

“If we are going to be compassionate, we have to have stricter border security and laws,” White said.

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This is who Donald Trump listens to when it comes to spiritual matters. Explains a lot, doesn’t it?