Photo: Eugene Hoshiko (AP, File)

Hello there. Were you having a relatively normal day? Well, let me share with you this fun little anecdote about a totally normal thing some right wing billionaires do to unwind. You’ll love it!

According to a report in the latest issue of The New Yorker, ultra-conservative mega-funder Rebekah Mercer (of the “let’s help establish Milo and Steve Bannon as national entities” Mercers) likes to invite friends over for a rousing game called “The Machine Learning President.”

And just what is The Machine Learning President, you ask?

From The New Yorker (emphasis mine throughout):

It’s a role-playing game, more like Assassin than like Monopoly, although players of this game do start out with an allotment of “cash” to spend on pushing their agendas, which can include “algorithmic policing” and “mass deportation.”

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Um, what the fuck?

...Each player takes on the role of a political candidate or a “faction,” in the game’s parlance. Among the possible roles are Mike Pence, Elizabeth Warren, Black Lives Matter, Russia, Y Combinator, Tom Steyer, Wall Street, Evangelicals, the Koch Network, and Robert Mercer himself.

Wait, Rebekah Mercer can play as her own father? What the fuck?

The Rules include a description of Mercer’s father’s “character.” “Robert Mercer,” the instructions say, “sits atop one of the most powerful geo-political networks on the planet,” which is “driven by a next-generation technology stack with a business model.”

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Seriously, what the fuck kind of game is this?

They continue, “The Mercers are building a global far-right movement to embed Judeo-Christian values” while “keeping government small, ineffective and out of the way.”

I beg of you, answer me this: What the fuck?

The player who assumes the persona of Robert Mercer starts the game with six hundred million dollars in “cash” to implement his “policy wishlist,” which includes “Mass Deportation of Undocumented Immigrants,” the creation of a “biometrics/Citizens ID,” the use of “Predictive/Algorithmic Policing,” and “Freedom of Religious Discrimination (healthcare, hiring).

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Ha (what) ha (the) ha (fuck?)

The Mercers, of course, are longtime friends of the Trumps and their inner circle, helping boost the administration’s worst, nativist voices while simultaneously hosting kooky costume parties where this happens:

Photo: Evan Vucci (AP)

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Look. As far as crazy rich people games go, I suppose this is better than, say, hunting other human beings for sport. But still: What the fuck??