White Music Ladies Are Battling but the Only Real Winner Is Remy Ma

Today, that white lady that looks like that other white lady who did the Chainsmokers song dropped a new song from her upcoming album. It’s called “Swish Swish” and it’s supposedly a diss track about the white lady who dates the British boys and who just lost another feud with that other other white lady who gave birth to North West. (Oh and some random white lady who was on Orange Is The New Black had some shit to say about it, I guess.) Normally in a situation like this, we all lose, but amidst all this rhu-Barbara (rhu-Becky?), it seems the only person who could possibly be inadvertently benefitting from this song is Remy Ma.

Anyway, despite the use of the Supreme font in the video image, a verse from Nicki Minaj, and a sample from Maya Jane Cole’s “What They Say” (which Nicki Minaj already used in “Truffle Butter”), the smooth ‘90s club-inspired track is bad. The lyrics are bad. They go like, “Your game is tired, You should retire, You’re ‘bout as cute as an old coupon expired.” Much like that other white lady who appropriated black culture (but not that other white lady who’s still trying to resuscitate twerking after the first one murdered it), this travesty borrows a lot of concepts and language from black culture like “keeping receipts” and “bish” and “I stay winning.”

What else do we expect? A dumb publicity stunt song from a white lady mid-rebranding is par for the course. But I’m not sure if Nicki Minaj, a talented, successful, and iconic rapper, understood how bad the song was when she decided to include a nod to her own beef with Remy Ma, which we all know Remy won with “shETHER” (I know, I know, Nicki has album sales blah blah blah and “shETHER” was mean and problematic). As we all know, not only did Nicki not respond for like three weeks, but when she did, she came back with three tracks, one of which actually responded to “shETHER” (it wasn’t great). But whatever. This was two months ago, old news.

Nicki Minaj’s verse in “Swish Swish” is fine, but for her to address the “silly rap beef” that she lost so long ago on this nice white lady’s terrible song (on a sample Nicki has already used!!) is just handing a win no one asked for to Remy Ma on a silver platter. Bon appétit I guess.